Archive | April, 2013

Churchill versus Cameron

30 Apr

It was announced last week that the new face of the five pound note is going to be Winston Churchill. Does that mean that in 70 years’ time David Cameron might end up with his chubby fizzog on a fiver too?

But which leader has the greater record? There’s only one way to find out! Cheap, satirical analysis.

Churchill – gave thanks to “the few”
Cameron – gave tax breaks to “the few”

Churchill – sank the Bismark
Cameron – sank the economy

Churchill – instilled the bulldog spirit
Cameron – instilled the Bullingdon spirit

Churchill – dominated by America
Cameron – dominated by A Merkel

Churchill – got our boys home from France
Cameron – left his kid in the pub

Churchill – destroyed the nazis
Cameron – destroyed the NHS

Churchill – outmanoeuvred by a great reformer
Cameron – outmanoeuvred by Boris Johnson

Churchill – gave the V-sign to the British people
Cameron – given the V-sign by the British people

Conclusion:

If they bring back the halfpenny in 2083, Cameron might just get his face on that.